Before we gave seatbelts a chance The WAY-BACK was beyond mom's glance, My sisters and brothers And sometimes some others Would tickle me till I peed in my pants.
I'm really not a nave at all But "narthex"? What else can you can call? For name changing hobby Say "foyer" or "lobby" But "narthex"? C'mon! What the hall!
Prescriptions can be pretty pricey But generics can also be dicey Can't stand Dr. Pepper? Wal-Mart's got one better Southern Lighting! Mmmm! Now that's spicy!
If the dating scene seems to complex Try your skillz in the church narthex You can get on your flirt Over bulletin inserts With chicks older than Oedipus Rex
Don't make me pull over this car. I've told you, I don't know how far. Now hands off your sister and listen up, mister, Before I take away your candy bar.
Ten o'clock and off to bed I creep, My hopes resting on a deep, long sleep. Many find their dreams to their liking, Even Ralph Wiggum dreams he's a viking. But when I see its 3 A.M., I weep.
When your child's cough leaves you irrate, Give them Wal-tussin to expectorate. But I give you fair warning, When you get up next morning, Their room you'll have to redecorate.
I don’t lose any sleep over Rasmussen And I agree with Dan when he’s not cussin’ But a few words when he talks Give me syllabus shock— What in the narthex is Wal-tussin?!?
Gosh darn it! You know I can't sleep, You're snoring like you are a Jeep, If this noise keeps going- IS YOUR NOSE A BOEING?!- Forget it. I'm counting Peep's sheep!
"Essay" this, and "grading scale" that. My syllabi stack is so fat. My heart's only solace, Is that Jazz Prof. Gonzales, Didn't fill hers with any old scat.
Creating each semester's class syllabus Is my personal Scylla and Charybdis. I want to work rock your head Without killing you dead I'd worry less if I quit and smoked cannabis.
**Note. I don't smoke weed and never have tried it. I imagine that if I did I would be an unemployed slacker who didn't worry about creating college classes. If this is an innacurate depiction of the lifestyle and attitude of pot smokers, please do not correct me. I don't want to know that you know that.
12 comments:
Before we gave seatbelts a chance
The WAY-BACK was beyond mom's glance,
My sisters and brothers
And sometimes some others
Would tickle me till I peed in my pants.
...true story.
One time I was up for three days.
My world was one giant haze.
I talked to Dan Buck,
And he was in luck,
For I had brought some Baked Lays...?
Wow that was awful...
Now for something you and Wiki just taught me.
Narthex is the church entrance
And was reserved for penitents.
It was Byzantine,
And can have a screen.
You could also baptize infants.
It's a little slant-y but oh well, I never claimed to be good at these.
I'm really not a nave at all
But "narthex"? What else can you can call?
For name changing hobby
Say "foyer" or "lobby"
But "narthex"? C'mon! What the hall!
Prescriptions can be pretty pricey
But generics can also be dicey
Can't stand Dr. Pepper?
Wal-Mart's got one better
Southern Lighting! Mmmm! Now that's spicy!
If the dating scene seems to complex
Try your skillz in the church narthex
You can get on your flirt
Over bulletin inserts
With chicks older than Oedipus Rex
In our '79 LTD Ford
Child safety laws were ignored
The backseat was crammed
And seat belts be damned
It was literally "Baby on Board"
Don't make me pull over this car.
I've told you, I don't know how far.
Now hands off your sister
and listen up, mister,
Before I take away your candy bar.
Ten o'clock and off to bed I creep,
My hopes resting on a deep, long sleep.
Many find their dreams to their liking,
Even Ralph Wiggum dreams he's a viking.
But when I see its 3 A.M., I weep.
When your child's cough leaves you irrate,
Give them Wal-tussin to expectorate.
But I give you fair warning,
When you get up next morning,
Their room you'll have to redecorate.
I don’t lose any sleep over Rasmussen
And I agree with Dan when he’s not cussin’
But a few words when he talks
Give me syllabus shock—
What in the narthex is Wal-tussin?!?
Gosh darn it! You know I can't sleep,
You're snoring like you are a Jeep,
If this noise keeps going-
IS YOUR NOSE A BOEING?!-
Forget it. I'm counting Peep's sheep!
-joey
"Essay" this, and "grading scale" that.
My syllabi stack is so fat.
My heart's only solace,
Is that Jazz Prof. Gonzales,
Didn't fill hers with any old scat.
-joey
The Prof's Limerick
Creating each semester's class syllabus
Is my personal Scylla and Charybdis.
I want to work rock your head
Without killing you dead
I'd worry less if I quit and smoked cannabis.
**Note. I don't smoke weed and never have tried it. I imagine that if I did I would be an unemployed slacker who didn't worry about creating college classes. If this is an innacurate depiction of the lifestyle and attitude of pot smokers, please do not correct me. I don't want to know that you know that.
Really, it was just an awesome rhyme!
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