Antiques Roadshow’s undoubtedly super, But what I’d like to see are the bloopers — When Nicholas Dawes Drops a priceless Ming vase, And calls for a broom and a scooper.
Went to Chick-Fil-A. I'm not their fellow; They had no cottage cheese. And no Jell-O. Later on, at a kegger, I met Miss Zellweger, But I didn't have her at "Hello."
I feel like some chicken so I get in my car. I drive a short distance, Chick-fila's not that far. I pull up, I'm ready. Today is the day. But alas, doors are closed, it is fucking Sunday.
Cottage cheese - not a tasty delight, Makes my taste-buds engage in a fight, I'm allergic to curd, And in case you've not heard, The mere sight of yogurt is a fright!
So I head for the Chicken-Fil-A, Where no milk products ruin my day, Driving thru for my burger, I noticed my server, None other-Zellwegger, Renee!
This fast food restaurant is my habit When a nugget's on my plate, I stab it But I find it too quaint It's my only complaint I can't get no chicken on the Sabbath?
When you say something's "bad," that means good When it's "sick," it's the best in the "hood" These kids today Have a very strange way Of making themselves understood-izzle
After the fiftieth porcelain toad We saw the host finally explode "You geezers are boring! The audience is snoring! You're antiques! It's a show! Hit the road!"
10 comments:
Antiques Roadshow’s undoubtedly super,
But what I’d like to see are the bloopers —
When Nicholas Dawes
Drops a priceless Ming vase,
And calls for a broom and a scooper.
Went to Chick-Fil-A. I'm not their fellow;
They had no cottage cheese. And no Jell-O.
Later on, at a kegger,
I met Miss Zellweger,
But I didn't have her at "Hello."
Me, Myself and Irene.
Zellweger on the silver screen.
She was great in Cold Mountain,
Her lips were a-poutin'
You've seen her unless you're a teen.
Chick-fila
I feel like some chicken so I get in my car.
I drive a short distance, Chick-fila's not that far.
I pull up, I'm ready.
Today is the day.
But alas, doors are closed, it is fucking Sunday.
The Boomers began this whole dance,
Generationally taking a stance,
The X-ers grew hair,
The Y-ers don't care,
And the Z-ers are still in my pants.
Cottage cheese - not a tasty delight,
Makes my taste-buds engage in a fight,
I'm allergic to curd,
And in case you've not heard,
The mere sight of yogurt is a fright!
So I head for the Chicken-Fil-A,
Where no milk products ruin my day,
Driving thru for my burger,
I noticed my server,
None other-Zellwegger, Renee!
This fast food restaurant is my habit
When a nugget's on my plate, I stab it
But I find it too quaint
It's my only complaint
I can't get no chicken on the Sabbath?
When you say something's "bad," that means good
When it's "sick," it's the best in the "hood"
These kids today
Have a very strange way
Of making themselves understood-izzle
After the fiftieth porcelain toad
We saw the host finally explode
"You geezers are boring!
The audience is snoring!
You're antiques! It's a show! Hit the road!"
"still in my pants?"
LMAO. Cachinnator: major props, man.
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